


Flower in the Attic

by 0bviousLeigh



Series: Children of War [6]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V
Genre: Character with PTSD, Gen, Suicidal thoughts and actions, healing is a process
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-02
Updated: 2016-09-02
Packaged: 2018-08-12 14:21:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7937947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/0bviousLeigh/pseuds/0bviousLeigh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yuri wakes up each night in a cold sweat, with Leo Akaba standing over him. It’s impossible, Yuri knows that. Leo Akaba is dead, how could he be in Yuri’s room? But it feels real, the way he smiles down at Yuri and whispers, ‘My perfect winner.’</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flower in the Attic

**Author's Note:**

> The ‘flower in the attic’ is the changes that are beginning to blossom in Yuri’s mind. No one is getting locked away in a secret attic and poisoned with arsenic in this story.

The new addition to the Sakaki household is complete, and there’s now enough space for all the boys to have their own rooms. Yuri sleeps by himself for a week, and wakes up each night in a cold sweat, with Leo Akaba standing over him. It’s impossible, Yuri knows that. Leo Akaba is dead, how could he be in Yuri’s room, in this new house? But it feels real, the way he smiles down at Yuri and whispers, ‘ _My perfect winner._ ’

Yuri screams until Yuya bursts in and flips on the light. Leo Akaba disappears, and Yuri is left to wonder if he’s going mad.

Dr. Fudo gives Yuri a sleep aide. Rather, he gives them to Yoko and tells her to let Yuri have one at night. Yuri doesn’t wake up when he takes the pills, but his dreams become more realistic. Or maybe he’s remembering things.

Like the time he didn’t eat for a week, and then the staff sat him in front of a table full of food. Yuri ate until he thought he would vomit, and then he did vomit. And when he was done, he looked up and saw Leo Akaba standing in front of him.

“I told them not to leave you alone,” he said, stroking Yuri’s hair. He hand fed Yuri a bowl of plain rice, and each time Yuri gagged, Leo Akaba told him to fight it and win. Yuri ate without vomiting, and Leo Akaba praised him. “You have to be a winner, Yuri.”

Curled up in his bed in the Sakaki house, Yuri realizes that Leo Akaba lied to him that day. He probably told the staff to leave Yuri alone with the food, let him gorge himself, come get him when Yuri threw up so he could be there to pick up the pieces of the little broken boy.

Yuri starts spitting out the sleeping pills and flushing them down the toilet. He stays up at night and thinks of ways to lose. He can’t be a winner anymore, if he keeps winning then that means that Leo Akaba is still controlling him. After five days without sleep, five days in which Yuri avoids everyone, fakes illnesses to get out of dinner, and locks himself away to plot his next move, Yuri figures it out.

“I have to break,” Yuri whispers. “I have to break myself.”

Yes, it’s perfect. He’ll break himself, and break what Leo Akaba worked for years on. But how to do it?

Yuri looks around his room. It’s newly built, he could probably break a wall apart, take a nail…no, that’s too complicated. A knife. A knife would be simple, right in his stomach. He’ll break slowly, painfully, and Leo Akaba will watch him bleed out.

Yuri goes to the door and wrenches it open. The dog is standing in front of his door, wearing the little bow tie that Yuri made for him three weeks ago. The dog wags his tail and barks at Yuri, standing on his hind legs. Yuri scoops up the dog, momentarily distracted. It licks his cheek, and Yuri smiles. Then he shakes himself.

“What am I doing?” Yuri asks. “I have a job to do.”

But the dog looks at Yuri, tongue lolling out of his mouth, inexplicably happy. If Yuri breaks…he’ll never see the dog again. He thinks the dog would miss him. It’s been glued to his side for months. Maybe Yuya would miss him.

“But only Yuya,” Yuri whispers. Everyone else would be happy. Yuto, Yugo, Shun, Rin, Ruri, Yuzu, probably Serena, too…they’d be happy.

Yuri puts the dog down and goes downstairs. It’s the middle of the night, nobody is around to watch Yuri make his way to the kitchen.

The dog begins barking frantically. It hops around Yuri’s feet and jumps on him.

“Stop,” Yuri says.

A light goes on at the top of the stairs. “En?”

It’s Yuya. He makes it halfway down the stairs before he sees Yuri. “You look terrible!” Yuya cries, rushing to Yuri’s side. He touches Yuri’s forehead. “You’re burning up. I knew we should have taken you to the hospital when you said you didn’t feel well, I’ll go get my mom.”

“Yuya,” Yuri says quietly. “Yuya…am I still just a puppet of Leo Akaba?”

Yuya freezes. “What? No, Yuri, why would you think that?”

Yuri sways on his feet. “He says I’m his perfect winner,” Yuri says, his words starting to slur together. He looks up. Leo Akaba is standing at the top of the stairs.

“No,” Yuri whimpers. “No, you can’t be here…go away…”

Yuya looks at the stairs. “Yuri, that’s Yugo.”

Yuri blinks. “It’s him…it’s Akaba…” he blinks again and Yugo’s face is in front of him.

“Yuri? Are you okay?” Yugo asks.

“You could do it,” Yuri says, reaching for Yugo, curling his fingers into Yugo’s sleep shirt. “You hate me, don’t you? You should break me. Maybe it’s better if I don’t do it myself.”

“What are you talking about?” Yugo asks.

“Knife,” Yuri says. “Take it and break me with it. I’ll finally lose.”

Yuya’s arms go around Yuri’s torso and he pulls Yuri away from Yugo. “No,” Yuya cries, “Oh god, Yuri, that’s not…Yugo, get my mom, call the hospital, we can’t let him hurt himself.”

Yuri’s legs give out. He’s gone too long without eating, he’s weak. He’s gotten too used to full meals. He used to be able to go longer without collapsing. Yuya lays Yuri out on the floor, Yuri’s head in his lap.

Yuya strokes Yuri’s cheeks and whispers, “It’s going to be okay. We’ll help you. Don’t give up.”

Yuya’s features blur, like he’s underwater. Yuri’s eyes are warm, and they hurt…is he crying?

“Don’t cry,” Yuya croons, his thumbs brushing under Yuri’s eyes. “We’ve got you.”

“Why?” Yuri asks. “You should hate me.”

Yuya presses his forehead to Yuri’s. “I don’t. I’ve seen what happened to you. It wasn’t your fault, Yuri. You were brainwashed, maybe not by a parasite but you were still brainwashed.”

Yuri looks over Yuya’s shoulder. Leo Akaba is there again. Yuri uses the last bit of his strength to grab Yuya’s shoulders.

“He’s watching me,” Yuri whispers.

Yuya looks over his shoulder, then back at Yuri. Yuya’s crying, too. “I’ll protect you,” Yuya promises. “I won’t let him hurt you.”

Yuri’s head falls back and he closes his eyes. He’s been fighting sleep for five days, and now he’s too weak to fight it any more.

 

Yuri wakes up with the sharp smell of alcohol and bleach in his nose. He turns his head and tries to roll over, but something is holding him back. He opens his eyes. He’s in a hospital bed, his arms pinned to the plastic guard rails.

“You tried to yank out your IV.”

Yuri turns his head towards the voice. It’s Yuto, he’s sitting beside Yuri’s bed, looking exhausted.

“After the third time, the doctors had to restrain you,” Yuto continues. “Do you remember it?”

Yuri shakes his head.

Yuto’s throat works as he swallows. “You…you were screaming about Leo Akaba.”

Yuri flinches at the sound of the name and he closes his eyes. “Is he here?”

“No…Yuri, he’s dead.”

“But I see him,” Yuri says. “Am I crazy?”

“No,” Yuto says firmly. “No, you’re probably hallucinating.”

“That means I’m crazy,” Yuri says.

“Don’t use that word,” Yuto orders.

Yuri sneers. “Crazy,” he hisses.

Yuto rubs his forehead. “Why are you so difficult?”

Yuri turns away from Yuto. “Fuck you. Where’s Yuya?”

“Home, sleeping,” Yuto says. “Figures that you woke up after Sora finally convinced him to go home. He’s been here for days.”

“Days?” Yuri repeats, looking back at Yuto.

“You’ve been here for three days,” Yuto says. His expression changes to one of pity. “The doctors said you lost a lot of weight. They said it was…a miracle you were still standing at all. You nearly died, Yuri. And I hear you asked Yugo to kill you.” Yuto’s expression changes again. “You said he hated you, and he should kill you.”

“You could have done it, too,” Yuri says. “You could do it now.”

“Damn it, Yuri!” Yuto cries, “I’m not going to kill you, none of us are! We don’t want that!”

“Why not?!” Yuri screams. His throat hurts and he coughs, and he continues in a weaker voice, “I just want to stop being Leo Akaba’s puppet.”

“You haven’t been that for months,” Yuto says. “You stopped when you faced him down with us. Would Leo Akaba’s puppet live in the Sakaki’s house? Would he sew dog clothes? My god, did you or did you not teach Yuya the scientific names of all your plants? Would Leo Akaba’s puppet do that?”

Yuri closes his eyes and shakes his head. “Then why is he still in my head?!” He screams, heedless of his aching throat. “I see him all the time! He says I’m his perfect winner! I don’t want to be his winner anymore!”

“That just shows how far you’ve come!” Yuto cries, and he leans over the bed, his hands on Yuri’s shoulders. “Don’t you get it? You are moving past him, you’re not who you used to be!”

Yuri bares his teeth. “Don’t. Touch. Me.”

Yuto takes his hands off Yuri’s shoulders. Yuri jerks against the restraints and glares at Yuto. “Get me out of these.”

“Are you going to strangle yourself in the IV line?” Yuto asks.

“Fuck you twice, now,” Yuri says. “Did you lie? Am I restrained because I’m suicidal?”

“Well if that wasn’t the reason before, it is now,” Yuto says. “I’m calling Yuya. Maybe you’ll be civil to him. Another thing that makes you the opposite of what Leo Akaba wanted, but hey what do I know? I only saw inside your head.”

“My head has changed since you saw it,” Yuri snaps.

Yuto looks at him oddly, then leave the room to make the phone call.

 

Yuya brings the dog.

The doctors undo the restraints and tell Yuri that they will put them back on if he tries to take his IV out or hurt himself. Yuri didn’t understand why they were letting him out of them until Yuya came in with the dog.

“How is he here?” Yuri asks, stroking the dog’s head.

Yuya hands Yuri a piece of paper. “We’ve been working on it with Dr. Aki since last week,” Yuya says. “En is yours now, he’s your therapy animal. Dr. Aki fast tracked the application since…En was the one who alerted us when you tried to hurt yourself. You can take him almost anywhere now.”

Yuri looks down at the dog in his lap. He looks up at Yuri, head turned to the side, tongue hanging out, adoration in those stupid eyes.

“Can dogs see souls?” Yuri asks.

“I’m not sure,” Yuya says. “But for some reason, En likes you.”

“A poor choice,” Yuri says.

Yuya sits on Yuri’s bed and gives him a pleading look. “What can I do to convince you that you’re not a monster?”

“Nothing,” Yuri says. “Because I am a monster. I hurt people. I enjoyed it. Do you understand that? I am sadistic.”

“ _Were,_ ” Yuya corrects. “You’ve been vastly different these last few months. I thought you were happier. I thought we were starting to be friends. I didn’t know you were still…well, I guess I did know you were still upset with yourself, with the world in general. I didn’t know you wanted to hurt yourself.”

Yuri cradles the dog to his chest. He bows his head, presses his chin to the dog’s head. “That was a recent development,” Yuri admits. “I just…wanted Leo Akaba’s ghost to leave me alone.” He wrinkles his nose. “Is it a ghost? Or is it in my head?”

“I don’t know,” Yuya says. “But I know that he wouldn’t recognize you if he could see you now. You’re not the same person you were with him.”

Yuri stares ahead, but rather than a wall, he sees memories flash in front of his eyes. “But why did I become what he wanted me to be in the first place?” Yuri asks. “I wasn’t like that in the orphanage. I was quiet, I was weak…maybe that’s why he picked me. Not because I looked like you, because he knew I would eat out of his hand if he gave me the slightest bit of attention.” Yuri laughs. “Literally, I ate out of his hand! So many times! God, I was stupid. I fell for his tricks.”

“No,” Yuya says, “You were a child. You weren’t supposed to know better.”

“I should’ve figured it out a long time ago,” Yuri protests. “All the signs were there. I see them now. He was using me. I let it happen for years. I was delusional. Maybe I still am.” He glares at Yuya. “Maybe you’re using me just like he did.”

Yuya shakes his head. “You know, I don’t think you mean that.”

Yuri sits back against his pillow. The dog snuggles into his chest and begins to snore. Yuri pets him absentmindedly. “Maybe I don’t. I did see inside your mind, after all. You are a very…I don’t even have a word for you.”

“Straightforward?” Yuya offers hopefully.

“Sure,” Yuri says.

“You know, Yuto told me something you said to him.”

“Be more specific.”

Yuya holds out his hand and after a brief hesitation, Yuri takes it. “Yuto told me that you said your mind had changed since we saw it,” Yuya says, stroking his thumb over the back of Yuri’s hand.

“It has,” Yuri says. “I’ve remembered things. And I’ve seen things in a new light, now. I don’t know how you could have seen them if I only just realized them myself.”

Yuya turns Yuri’s hand over, palm up, and places a card in it. Yuri’s eyes fill with tears when he sees what it is.

“Starve Venom,” Yuri whispers. He hasn’t seen his dragon in weeks, since Leo Akaba started appearing to him. He put the card in his deck holder and left it there. He can feel the dragon reaching out to him, prodding at him as if to ask what’s going on. Starve Venom isn’t the same either. The dragon and Yuri are both ashamed of themselves, and Yuri has been neglecting his dragon.

Yuri cradles the card to his chest, alongside the dog. “I’m sorry,” Yuri tells the dragon. “I should have at least let you see.”

Yuri can almost feel the spirit of the dragon draping itself around him, surrounding him with its acceptance. Yuri should have known Starve Venom would never be disappointed in him. They’ve been together for years, since the orphanage. The other children said Starve Venom was creepy and ugly, a good fit for Yuri, who was also creepy and ugly, and loved creepy and ugly plants. Yuri would hug the card to his chest and tell Starve Venom that it wasn’t ugly, or creepy. Yuri saw its power and grace and treasured it for those reasons. When Yuri went to Academia he would summon Starve Venom even when he wasn’t dueling, simply so he could admire the beautiful creature. He would run his fingers over the dragon’s scales and nuzzle its gaping maw, heedless of the poison that dripped from its mouth. Starve Venom’s poison never hurt Yuri, no matter how many times it got on Yuri’s skin. The dragon would never harm its master. In many ways, Starve Venom was Yuri’s first friend.

“Yuri?”

Yuri looks up at Yuya, blinking back tears. “What?”

“Can we try the…can we try with Yugo and Yuto, coming together as one again?”

Yuri bites his lip. His hand, Starve Venom’s card heats up.

Yuri looks down at the card. “You think I should?” He asks, feeling a bit hurt. He can almost feel Starve Venom nudging his shoulder, trying to comfort him. _These people can help you,_ the dragon seems to be saying.

“I’m not sure I believe that,” Yuri says out loud.

“Believe what?” Yuya asks.

“That you can help me,” Yuri snaps.

“I’m not sure I can, either,” Yuya says. “But I can try.”

Yuri shuts his eyes tightly and presses his hands to his head. The dog slips down his chest and lands in his lap with a yelp. Yuri ignores it.

“Would Yuto and Yugo even agree?” Yuri asks.

“They already have,” Yuya says. “They’re waiting outside.”

Yuri grits his teeth.

“It won’t work if you don’t believe in it,” Yuya says.

“I know,” Yuri groans. “Ugh, fine, let them in.”

Yuya gets up from the bed and opens the door to the room. Yuri keeps his eyes closed but he can feel when Yugo and Yuto sit on either side of him, and Yuya sits in front of him. When Yuri does open his eyes, he keeps them on the dog in his lap. Its looking at him, and Yuri wraps his arms around the dog and thinks to himself that he really needs to think of a new name for it. Him.

“How are you feeling?” Yuto asks.

“Peachy,” Yuri says dryly, his eyes still on the dog.

Yugo clears his throat. “For the record, I would never hurt you.”

Guilt flashes through Yuri. It’s entirely unexpected, but if he thinks about it, Yuri’s not really surprised by it.

Yuya places his hand on Yuri’s arm. “You should let En on the floor.”

Reluctantly, Yuri lets Yuya take the dog and put him on the floor. Yuri is left with Starve Venom, and he clutches the card in his hands. The other three take their dragons from their deck holders and hold them.

“What now?” Yugo asks.

But they don’t get a chance to wonder about the next step for long. The cards glow, and Yuri feels a burning in his eyes. There’s a flash of white light, and it fades to a comfortable glow. Yuri can feel them, then. Yuya, Yuto, and Yugo. They surround him, and Yuri flinches back for a moment. Yuya approaches cautiously, his presence warm and comforting.

“Let us see what you see,” Yuya’s voice says, echoing around the endless space. “We want to help.”

Yuri hesitates, and Yugo and Yuto come forward, sending similar messages.

“We want to help.”

Yuri’s defenses collapse. Memories from years ago, from weeks ago, and from the last few days come bursting forth, flooding the white space and filling it with color, with anger and a sense of regret. The memories play, as though on a movie screen. They show Leo Akaba as Yuri now sees him, a monster who broke a child, who created another monster. Yuri shows his counterparts what he sees when he wakes up in the night. He shows them how he felt the night he decided to break himself. Hopeless, trapped, victimized, unwanted.

Yuya latches on to that last feeling. “I want you here.”

Yuri can’t bring himself to form words. He pictures Shun, Ruri, Rin, and Yuzu.

“They might be angry,” Yuto says, “But they don’t want to hurt you. They could understand if you would give them a chance.”

Yuri can’t feel his physical body anymore, but he can feel an ache at those words. He shies away from Yuto and Yugo’s presences, and he knows that they can feel his hesitation, his disbelief that they could ever be anything more than tolerant of his existence.

“No!” Yugo shouts. Yuya hushes him, and Yugo continues more quietly, “Maybe before we dueled Leo Akaba, but not now.”

Yuri finds his voice. “No one changes that fast.”

“You did,” Yuto says. “You helped us.”

“For myself,” Yuri counters.

“Maybe at first,” Yuya says. “But I believe you were changing even then.”

Yuya shows Yuri his memories of the duel. He shows Yuri how he looked, from Yuya’s perspective. Furious at Leo Akaba, but when Yuri looked at Yuya and Yugo, and later Yuto, he was…curious. Yuri finds himself staring at his own face, through Yuya’s eyes. Yuya shows Yuri more memories, of the day they burned the bouquet, of the times he sat with Yuri when he sewed clothes for the dogs, and he shows Yuri how his actions looked through another person’s eyes. Yuri was tired, frustrated, happy, hopeful, and nothing like how he was when Yuya first met him.

Yuto shares memories of dinners they ate together, how he noticed each time Yuri quietly thanked Yoko for her hard work. Yuto remembers the mutual looks of fond exasperation he and Yuri shared when they caught Yuya stealing food when his mother’s back was turned. Yugo shows Yuri a memory of a night when Yugo woke up from a nightmare, and Yuri was the only one who woke up. Yuri gave him tissues and water, and Yugo confesses he expected Yuri to laugh at him, but Yuri had instead confessed that he had nightmares, too, and he was sorry for causing Yugo’s.

Yuri feels like crying. He wonders if his physical body is crying.

“See?” Yuya asks. “You changed, and it’s good. You may not feel it, but Yuri, we can see it. We could tell you about it if you would talk to us, or let us talk to you. We’re in this together.”

The connection between them breaks. Yuri is thrown back into his own body, and he’s assaulted by everything that’s happening to him. He is, in fact, crying, and he’s confused by what broke the connection, until he realizes that he’s crying so hard he can’t breathe.

“Oh god, we really did break him,” Yugo blurts.

Yuri starts to laugh and cry at the same time, and now he really can’t breathe. Yuya scoops En off the floor and puts him back in Yuri’s lap, and the dog starts to lick the tears and god knows what-else off Yuri’s face. Yuri clutches the dog to him and sobs into his fur, but he picks his head up when he inhales dog hair.

“Ugh,” Yuri whimpers, wiping his mouth.

Yuya laughs and uses a tissue to wipe at Yuri’s face, and then he holds out his arms. “Hug?”

Yuri falls into Yuya’s arms, En trapped between them as Yuri cries on Yuya’s shoulder.

“Get in on this,” Yuya tells Yuto and Yugo.

“Yuri doesn’t like us touching him,” Yuto says.

“It’s okay,” Yuri manages to choke out.

So Yuto and Yugo join the hug, their arms around Yuri and Yuya, their heads pressed to Yuri’s shoulders. En continues to jump up at Yuri’s face and lick him, and Yuri can honestly say that he’s never felt so accepted in his life. Dare he say…he’s never felt so loved.

Yuri hears the click of the door opening and Sora shouts, “Oh boy, dog pile on Yuri!”

It’s all the warning they get before Sora shoves his way into the group hug and squishes Yuri’s face to his chest. “Good to see you awake, Yuri!”

“Thank you,” Yuri mumbles, and he spits Sora’s shirt from his mouth.

“Ugh,” Sora says, releasing Yuri and frowning at his shirt, “Thank you for that.”

Yuri wipes his eyes, and Yuya hands him a tissue. Yuri needs about eight more tissues to blow his nose, and when he’s finally cleaned himself up and can breathe again, Sora makes an announcement.

“You have visitors.”

“I’m aware,” Yuri says, looking around the room.

Sora shakes his head. “No, I mean visitors. Dennis is here, and so are Serena, Yuzu, Shun and all of them, and I think Reiji is on his way.”

Yuri gapes at Sora. “What?”

“Oh yeah,” Yuya says, a bit sheepishly, “Well, we told them that you were…that you had a breakdown, and then when Yuto told me you were awake I told them. They were really worried about you, I guess they wanted to see if you were okay.”

Yuri looks towards the closed door. “They’re here now?”

“Yep,” Sora says, “And they want to see you, if you’re up for it.”

Yuri looks at Yuya, and his fear must show, because Yuya takes his hands and says, “It’s okay, we’ll be here for you, and you can say no if you want.”

Yuri looks between Yuya, Yuto, and Yugo. “What do you think I should do?”

“We can’t tell you that,” Yugo says, “But…I think you might be pleasantly surprised by what they have to say to you.”

“And we will stay with you, if you want,” Yuto adds.

Yuri inhales deeply and closes his eyes. He’s got Yuya, Yugo, and Yuto. He’s got Starve Venom, and En, and he’s got a new picture of himself.

“Well…what do I say if they ask…if I’m okay?” Yuri asks, opening his eyes again.

Yuya answers, “That you’re working on it. You will need to stay here for a few more days, since you still are very weak, and under observation for suicidal behavior. And when you go home, you’re meeting with Dr. Aki and Dr. Fudo like, right away to discuss what happened. It’ll be a process, recovering from this, but you’re not alone in it. You just have to keep remembering that.”

Yuri nods. “I’m not alone,” he whispers. He nods again. “Okay, I’ll see them.”

Sora jumps from the bed. “Great! I’ll go let them in.”

He opens the door, and people flood the room.

 _‘Wow,’_ Yuri thinks to himself, _‘I didn’t know I had so many friends.’_

**Author's Note:**

> /SCREAMS/
> 
> Somehow, I ended up shipping Yuya and Yuri in this series. IDK how I’ll proceed with that, or if I will at all. What do you guys think? Can you see it making sense, or would I need to provide more backstory before you could see it happening? I’m the writer so I feel like I see things differently? I’m the omniscient narrator here, so it all makes sense to me, is this story making sense to you guys???
> 
> TALK TO MEEEEE I’M SO LONELY


End file.
